The Road to Self-Improvement

Posted by Liberty Hen in Cautionary Tales | 6 comments

Brown Owl has published a pamphlet of Useful Sayings to catch the Village Hall Coffee Morning Market. It is full of timely advice for those trudging along The Road to Self-Improvement.

Unfortunately, despite my regular New Year resolutions to evolve into a fine upstanding villager, I have noticed that far from being healthy, wealthy and wise this morning, I am in fact, barely functioning.

Barely functioning

As you may imagine, I am determined to pinpoint exactly how I got myself into this sorry state &

1. learn from it
2. get a grip for the future.

Where I went Wrong:

Last night, I didn’t go to bed early. In fact, I didn’t go to bed at all.  After supper, the Agent went to bed and I decided to watch the first episode of  ‘The Crown’ on Netflix. Be warned! Newly wise after the event, I now know I made not just one but two bad errors of judgement.

Mistake #1.  I signed up to Netflix

Mistake #2. by snuggling up on a bean bag with lots of cushions under a rug, I made myself too warm and cosy.

Having enjoyed Episode 1 very much, I thought I’d quickly watch Episode 2:

& Episodes 3, 4, 5…

& Episodes 7, 8…..

& Episodes 9, 10 …

…ZZZ zzzz  zzz zz

Yours vowing never to binge watch Netflix again,

Stir Up Sunday & The Week in Focus

Posted by Liberty Hen in Castle Coop News | 4 comments

 TAH 11/20-16

It has been another busy week here in Castle Coop…

Monday:

The Awesome Hen is proud to report that Castle Coop was well represented at our local Remembrance Ceremony yesterday. Those there all agree that the sight and sound of the Chinook flying over the War Memorial and the length of the Street to mark the end of the 2 Minute Silence was very moving.

The Dickin Medal: They also served…

Lady Egality Maran writes: On behalf of the many dearly loved pets in our  village, Castle Coop is proud to remember the many animals who have served their countries.

As of April 2016, the  Dickin medal, instituted by Maria Dickin to honour any animal displaying conspicuous gallantry and devotion to duty whilst serving with British Empire armed forces or civil emergency services has been awarded 67 times.

In recognition of all animals who have served in times of conflict, Lady Sebright, Lady Lohmann-Brown, Lady Egality Maran and Lady Liberty Hen put poppies on their dogs’ collars.

 Photograph: Martha wearing her poppy proudly ( she is not very brave & likes her home comforts & she is very aware that those who are brave & self-sacrificing should be honoured).

Source: Liberty Hen

 Tuesday:

A message from Sir Plymouth Rock:

Dear Castle Coopian, 

 

I am writing on behalf of our local Member of Parliament, Sir Hans Welsummer, to invite you to a Public Meeting with him on Friday 18th November at 7pm in the Village Hall. Sir Hans was elected last year to represent the Coop Constituency. He will make a short opening address at which he will talk about life in Westminster as an MP and some of the causes he particularly supports but he wishes specifically to listen to villagers about any concerns that you may have locally or indeed nationally. 

Best wishes, 

 

Sir Plym

Wednesday:

Brown Owl visited several houses in Castle Coop to canvas support for the Advent Church Clean up. She wishes to tell anyone who was out when she came round, that she Will Be Calling Back.

Thursday:

During a spell of bright autumnal sunshine, the Agent and Liberty Hen spent several hours collecting leaves in their garden.

 Friday:

TAH Newsletter is pleased to have been asked by our tireless New Year’s Eve Party Committee to reassure all Castle Coopians that plans for the traditional celebratory ceilidh are well underway.

Lady Sebright writes:

A few of us have met to discuss the arrangements already. Our format this year will be very similar to last year but there are slight changes to how jobs will the allocated, the menu & cost per head.
This year we’re suggesting we make a Swaddles Pie for the main course, this is a slightly spicy shepherd’s pie. This will allow us to reduce the cost per head to £6 which is plenty to cover the cost of the hall plus a couple of glasses of prosecco for everyone.

Swaddles shepherd’s pie (Serves 6-8 )

• 1 large onion
• 6 cloves garlic
• Sunflower oil
• Salt and pepper
• 1 red chilli, chopped
• 2in fresh grated ginger
• 1/2 tsp turmeric
• 1/2 tsp cinnamon
• 1/2 tsp ground allspice
• 1/2 tsp ground nutmeg
• 900g/2 lb minced lamb
• 1 tbsp tomato purée
• 1 tbsp lemon juice
• 1 tsp fresh thyme
• Fresh coriander
• Mashed potato made with 900g/2 lb potatoes, and extra butter for the top

Preheat oven to 190C/370F/Gas 5. Peel, chop and saute¿ the onion and garlic gently until softened in a couple of tablespoons of sunflower oil, sprinkling a bit of salt on. Add the chopped chilli and ginger and the spices, then add the meat and brown it. Add the tomato pureé, lemon and thyme and simmer gently for about 40 minutes. Season with salt and pepper, throw in a couple of tablespoons of chopped fresh coriander, cover with mounds of mash, dot with butter and bake in the oven for about 30-40 minutes. You want a bubbling, crustily browned top. Serve with cumin-spiced carrots.

Source: Tamsin Day Lewis at The Telegraph

TAH Newsletter is also delighted to report that the Public Meeting in which villagers discussed important issues of the day with Sir Hans Welsummer (MP) & aired their concerns in a lively Q&A session, was extremely well attended. All agreed that it was a most interesting opportunity to meet our constituency representative in Parliament & the evening was a great success. TAH has been asked to thank Sir Plym formally on everyone’s behalf for all the hard work he undertook to arrange the event as it is very much appreciated by us all.

Saturday:

Lost Cat:  A lost cat has taken up residence in the Ox and Moose. It is black with a white underside. It is being well looked after but if anyone knows where it lives please let the O&M know.

Stir Up Sunday:

Stop Press: A big thank you to our readership from TAH editorial team for all the detective work; the cat has been reunited with its owners & is now safely back home.

Trev the Rev delivered the traditional Stir-Up Sunday Sermon from the pulpit in St. Mary’s Church with his usual vim & vigour.

Having taken note of the date, Liberty Hen has been tackling her Christmas pudding

and is keeping her fingers crossed that, although cooking is not a Liberty Hen strong point, the pudding will turn out to be both edible & festive. The Agent was pleased that quite a bit of brandy was added to help it along.

Yours on behalf of our crack Editorial Team here at The Awesome Hen,

Stop the World: I want to get off!

Posted by Liberty Hen in Castle Coop News | 10 comments

Yours knowing this time, smelling salts won’t be enough…

Our Anniversary!

Posted by Liberty Hen in Castle Coop News | 4 comments

Our Anniversary!

Today The Agent & I have been married for 32 years!

Sir Burford Brown came by and seeing our Anniversary cards, kindly wished us a happy celebration. Then he asked if we’d realised that these days, you get less time for murder & roared with laughter.

We were married at 2.30 in the afternoon and The Agent was late as he went to the wrong church first by mistake. Without realising he was at St. Francis’ church instead of St. Michael’s, he walked all the way up the aisle with his Best Man, only to find another Groom in morning dress already seated in the front pew glowering at him.

10 reasons why I’m glad the Agent realised his mistake & didn’t marry the other bride

(who apparently was extremely pretty) instead of me :

1. I like remembering him singing ‘Guide Me O Thou Great Redeemer’ at our wedding.
2. I don’t think my life would be much fun without either him or the Chicks major, minor and minimus in it.
3. He always brings me a cup of tea in bed on Saturday & Sunday mornings.
4. He doesn’t get cross when I wake him up in the night to tell him something I’ve just thought of.
5. He doesn’t mind when I burn the supper. I hope that he doesn’t anyway.
6. He makes me laugh.
7. He showed me how to use the gears on my bike and then showed me again.
8. He gives me flowers.
9. He didn’t get cross with me when I pranged his car.
10. He shows me where the constellations are in the night sky and tells me what the stars are called.

1 reason why the Agent might be glad he married me:

1. There are many, many skills which alas, I don’t possess but I do happen to be an excellent remover of spiders. As it turned out, this has come in very handy during our marriage for while the Agent turns pale if he spots anything moving with more than 4 legs, I remain calm. Isn’t that lucky?  And…perhaps the other bride might have hesitated at the altar if asked to sign up to 32 years’ worth of arachnid disposal.

Yours hoping that he really didn’t mind too much when I dented the car,